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18 August 2014

Diary of a Bride-to-be: Handling the helpers

I’ve never planned a wedding before so I’m more than happy to hold my hands up and say I’m pretty clueless when it comes to most of the details. What I do have is a pretty clear idea of what we want and the budget we have to work with, so when people around us start recommending suppliers it can be tricky to just say no.

I’ll do anything to avoid any sort of awkward conversation and what I’ve learnt so far is that when planning a wedding, it’s almost inevitable. All of a sudden everyone in our life knows “the best cake maker” or “the most amazing photographer” – which is all well and good bar the fact they are either out of our price range, or just not our bag.

At a local pub we casually mentioned we would be looking at photographers, before we knew it our details were being passed on to a pricy photographer who now calls us on an almost daily basis. He seems like a nice guy (maybe a tad pushy!) but his photography really isn’t our style and his pricing is way more than we’ve budgeted for. I’m causing myself a nightmare because all I need to say is that we’re not interested and that would be the end of it – but I don’t want to offend the person that recommended him and I don’t want to offend him.

At a family party I had an old family friend announce that she was honoured to be doing my flowers which was lovely, apart from the fact that I hadn’t actually asked her to do them and I’ve no idea how much she’ll charge. I’d had a few drinks at the party but I don’t think it was to the point where I was appointing elderly ladies with the task of all things floral. I’m not even confident she was ever a florist.

Time to Stand Firm with the Helpers

Over the past week I’ve come to the realisation that this is going to keep happening and if I don’t speak now, I’ll end up with a wedding so far removed from what we want and spending twice as much as we’d planned.

No, lady who knows the cake maker, me and my mum are going to have a crack at doing it ourselves so we won’t be requiring a £600 creation from your friend whose portfolio includes a cake shaped like a stiletto in pink glitter which is weirdly phallic.

No, person who keeps us telling their photographer friend is the best in the business, we’ve found a guy who is half the price and doesn’t do every single shot with the bride and groom in silhouette – I don’t love my face but I’d quite like to see it in some of my wedding photos.

Elderly possible florist lady – I’m going to need to see what you can create before you announce to everyone that you’re doing my flowers so hold your horses, start showing me some actual arrangements and tell me how much it’s going to set us back.

Now – if I can just get those words off this screen and out of my mouth, we’ll be sorted.



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